Archive for the ‘Reflection’ Category

Midweek Plug: On Race, Privilege, and Medicine

Friday, February 26th, 2010

One of my favorite blogs to read is guhster’s “On Race, Privilege, and Medicine“, and not merely because she’s a great friend of mine. Jess has a way of noticing all the little prejudiced insensitivities that permeate our society and our lives. Most of us brush such things off as “not a big deal”, but Jess tends to grab the reader by the collar and force them to admit that they are. She manages to avoid the peril of hypocrisy by being unflinchingly honest, especially with herself.

 

Her self-honesty is perhaps most evident in her writings on identity. A deep plunge into the core of one’s being is always scary prospect. Who knows what ugliness (or grace) might be found? Who knows what hurts have been buried out of sight and what joys have gone underappreciated? (Luckily,) she shows a good bit more courage than I do, and invites us to take a look with her.

 

Strangely enough, even though her blog rarely touches on religion (and she is, in fact, areligious herself), whenever I read it, I can’t help but reflect on my own beliefs. Perhaps trudging through the failings of (im)polite society reminds me that I am to be salty. That I am to bring light. And picking through the pieces of my life makes me ever more thankful that my identity ultimately lies in the fact that I am Christ’s.

 

Her insights and writings are well worth the read. (Even if they don’t inspire you to religion.)

 

The Valentine’s Day Smorgasborg Post

Monday, February 15th, 2010

Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

I was going to pen a relationship manifesto for Valentine’s Day, but I realized that I a) don’t have enough material for a manifesto, and b) would prefer for any future significant other to learn about my thoughts regarding romance and relationships through our time together and not from a blog post. That said, I do have a bunch of off-the-cuff observations that I’m willing to share.

 

In slightly more important holiday news, Happy Chinese New Year of the Tiger! =D

 

——

 

Back when I was in undergrad, I promised to myself that if I were still single in my mid-late 20’s, I would not turn into one of those young adults that constantly bemoaned their singleness. I think that I’ve avoided that fate so far, but I’m a little bit more sympathetic towards them now.

Some of you may remember the very first Valentine’s Day post. I’d like to think that I’ve come a long way since then, but probably not really,

I used to cringe whenever my friends offered to me up. It’s still kind of awkward, but I appreciate the vote of confidence.

I’m not picky, I just have a high activation energy for interest recognition. (As opposed to a low activation energy for interest disqualification.)

I’ve said it before, but I have the coolest 2n wheel friends.

There are many great benefits to being single. Most people forget to appreciate them.

I don’t think I’m cut out to be single for life, but if that’s the way things turn out, God has been, still is, and forever will be all that I need and more than enough.

If you wait too long, the one you’re waiting for will be gone.

Yes, you can have platonic friendships with members of the opposite gender.

I don’t understand how people build long-distance romantic relationships from nothing, but it happens.

Creating an online dating profile takes time. Time that I evidently spend combing the internet news instead.

I used to joke that I wanted to be dating someone before jeneric got married. I now joke that I want to be dating someone before they have a child. I think that gives me at least of 1.5 years. Time to get to work. Or stop joking.

 

Ashes to ashes, bytes to bytes

Wednesday, January 20th, 2010

 

One of the unexpected pleasures of going home for Christmas was going through my dad’s boxes boxes upon boxes of old files. There was almost nothing of sentimental value, just portfolios for projects long past. Still, it was fascinating to scan through the reams of paper. Scraps of handwritten notes, names of coworkers that I barely recognized, the places where my father went for business. The barest of glimpses into the life my father had outside of the home.

 

I saved a folio for myself, a momento of the work my father poured his life into, but which I never really understood. The rest of the files are marked to be shredded; after all, what purpose do they now serve? If I really want to be reminded of my father’s legacy, I need merely look in the mirror.

 


 

Changing gears a bit, digging through my father’s boxes made me a little bit sad about the transition to the digital age. My father had saved hundreds (thousands?) of work files. Mostly computer printouts, but they were at least physical and tactile and you could skim through the odd page or three. Me? I will leave behind hundreds (thousands?) of gigabytes of data, which frankly, makes for a much less enjoyable sorting experience.

 

I would also be sorely remiss to not mention that my father’s legacy includes (and perhaps more importantly, includes) the rest of my immediate family and his family and friends. It just makes for terribly clunky writing that I am not quite good enough to de-clunkify.

 

What I’m reading ed. 100116

Saturday, January 16th, 2010

Way too much happens over the course of two weeks. It took me 2 hrs just to take all the links and clippings and format them >.< . But for now, here’s the news. Again, highlights are in red.

 


 

Haiti

  • Estimated death toll: 50,000 + rising. To put this into perspective, the 2004 tragic tsunami killed ~250,000 people in Indonesia (pop 240M), or about 1 in 1,000. Haiti has a population of 10M, meaning the earthquake killed about 1 in 200 (and possibly up to 1 in 50 (!))
  • Updates from TheLede (NYT): Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
  • Advice on giving (from various development blogs): 1, 2, 3, 4
  • Photos from Haiti

 

(more…)

The not quite New Year’s post

Saturday, January 9th, 2010

New Year’s Eve/Day is a funny thing. While I’ll gladly take any excuse to take a day off and party, it strikes me as slightly amusing that we’re essentially celebrating an arbitrary marker of the fact that we’ve managed to make it one more year without destroying human civilization. Hmm…I wonder how many people are celebrating the events of the past year, and how many people are celebrating the hope of having a fresh start.

 

At any rate, now that it’s 9 days after 2009, (um…just…like…I…planned?) here’s a quick look back on 2009 and a quick look forward to 2010.

 

9 things I will remember about 2009

  • Death
  • Grace
  • Obama
  • Weddings
  • Economic collapse
  • Iran
  • Healthcare
  • Political dysfunction
  • Michael Jackson

 

0 things that I will look forward to in 2010

 

And that’s a wrap!

 


 

Some more professional looks at the past year

  • Time’s photographs of the year
  • The decade for the world (NYT)
  • 2009 in one wordle (NPR)
  • And, NYT’s awesome decade recap.

New Year’s Perspective

Friday, January 1st, 2010

A real 2009 wrap up post will come shortly (I hope), but there’s nothing like spending a New Year’s Eve dinner with my parents’ friends to put a little perspective on my life.

 

I’m looking at the prospect of graduating into the tail end of the worst US recession in 26 years.

 

They narrowly missed out on being a part of the Cultural Revolution.

 

Yeah, I’ll take Door A please.

 

And…on that note…Happy New Year’s everybody!

 

Merry Christmas

Friday, December 25th, 2009

6 Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,

 

7 but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.

 

8 And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!

 

9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,

 

10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

 

11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

 

~Philippians 2:6-11

 


 

Mindblowing. Always. Amen.

 

Laying Roots

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

Community is a big buzzword nowadays. Organizations seek to develop it, and people seek to be part of one. Technology gives us more ways to connect than ever, but yet, for many of us, we still feel isolated.

 

Much has been written about this phenomenon already, but there is one facet of “isolation” that doesn’t get mentioned too often. I myself didn’t notice until I was talking with some churchmates about community building. I realized that while I find plenty of community amongst my classmates and within my church, I don’t feel particularly in touch with the city that I live in.

 

Don’t get me wrong, Chicago’s a great city, and midwesterners are plenty friendly. There are loads of fun things to do, lots of great restaurants, and I haven’t been yelled at by (too many) passersby on the street. On the other hand, even after living here for a few years, I know only a handful of my neighbors, and none outside of my apartment building. I don’t know where the local, non-transients gather. And I wouldn’t be able to tell you what the day-to-day political and social concerns of my neighborhood are. (Yes, I know we lean liberal)

 

Part of it is due to my choice of lifestyle. I don’t shop. I don’t drink coffee. If I eat out, it’s at a different place every time. In fact, the only establishments I frequent on a regular basis are my church (which is filled with fellow transients) and the big chain grocery store. If I stopped going to the grocery store, I’m pretty sure that my presence would not be missed.

 

Another factor is my approach to building relationships. I tend to build my connections through people and groups and activities instead of through location and proximity. They might not sound all that different, after all, activities are required to take place at an actual location (ie. basketball must be played at a basketball court), but in my experience, the friends I’ve made through common interest tend to be just as unrooted in the local community as I am.

 

The finally, fear. Fear of breaking through the walls of social politeness. Fear of connecting with someone who I might share very little in common with. It’s easy to build connections with my classmates because we’re similar, and it’s acceptable, if not expected. Getting beyond small talk with the local ultimate frisbee crew feels (though probably isn’t) a little dicier.

 

Is this even a problem? For me personally? Not at the moment. I’m lucky enough to be a student AND a Christian, two groups which tend to have ready-made communities to plug oneself into. But I have the sense that a lot of my peers aren’t quite so lucky. Maybe their interest doesn’t lend itself so readily to group settings. Maybe there’s no suitable group nearby. It’s _really_ easy to while away time watching TV or surfing the internet (or writing blog posts….) and feel like you’re being stimulated and connecting with people. I don’t want to imply that online relationships are somehow inferior to offline ones, but there’s an aspect of physical proximity that can’t be replicated in an online environment.

 

So, what’s to be done? I’ve alluded to a few ways above, but what else is there? I suppose it might happen naturally if/once I own a place, settle down, get married, and have kids, but that’s a) a big if and b) doesn’t really help me right now.

 

For those of you who have a bit more local pride than I do, what do you think led to its development? Any suggestions for how to build those connections?

Political Disclosure

Saturday, December 5th, 2009

Well, before I start up with what will probably be a steady-ish stream economic/social/political/culture/fun links, I suppose I be transparent about the perspectives that I currently carry within me (subject to change), since they will undoubtedly influence what I post. (ed. These sound like really bad fortune cookie notes.)

 

  • First and foremost, I am a follower of Christ.
  • I am Chinese-American. More American than Chinese, though hopefully it will even out over time (unlikely.)
  • I believe in the power of reason and strength of the irrational.
  • I am idealistic regarding people (sing.) and cynical regarding populations, structures, and corporations.
  • I am solution agnostic.
  • The free market does not always know best. Nor does the government. Nor do the people.
  • Nothing is as simple as it appears.
  • The best is often the worst enemy of the better.
  • Goals should be ideal, implementation pragmatic, and expectations realistic.
  • Just because the ideal is unattainable doesn’t mean that the attempt shouldn’t be made.
  • Just because something is worthwhile doesn’t mean that the cost should be paid.
  • Equal opportunity leads to unequal outcomes leads to unequal opportunity.
  • Both/and, not either/or. The trick lies in the balance.
  • I am neither liberal nor conservative nor independent.
  • I strive to seek truth. I wish to act boldly. I hope to live humbly. I struggle to be spirit led.
  • I know little. I am learning.
  • I am a work in progress
  • I am a sinner.
  • I am saved (by grace)

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away. … And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” ~Revelations 21:1-4

Giving Thanks

Saturday, November 28th, 2009

Thanksgiving 2009Thanksgiving. As I count my blessings today, I find my thoughts turning to the plight of the less (un?) fortunate. I’ve read too much and I’ve seen too much and am at a bit of a loss as to what to do about it all.

 

“Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Luke 10:27)

 

But who is my neighbor?

 

Is it the person living next door? Down the block? Downtown? Down state? Down country? Down Under?

 

Is it the coworker who’s being crushed by the weight of simultaneous deadlines, the death of her father, and a son who is failing out of high school?

 

Is it the (maybe/maybe not) homeless guy rattling a coin cup at the Jewel-Osco?

 

Is it the child slowly wasting away from malnutrition in Somalia due to drought and strife?

 

Is it the working father of two struggling to make ends meet because she’s working three part-time minimum wage jobs and doesn’t qualify for health insurance through any of them.

 

Is it the student protester in Iran, critiquing the regime, and possibly risking his life?

 

Is it 30-year old woman convicted of murder and imprisoned for life, with nothing to turn to and nothing to live for?

 

Is it the Chinese teenager poisoning herself to death by earning a living in an electronics recycling plant without safey protocols or protective equipment?

 

Is it the octagenarian grandfather, left alone in a nursing home by his children?

 

In the passage that follows, the Parable of the Good Samaritan, one’s neighbor is basically whoever you come across that just so happens to be in need. Nowadays, however, you can essentially “come across” just about anyone in any situation anywhere in the world. Not only that, you can provide tangible assistance to them (or at least donate money.) So does that same rule of thumb still hold? If so, the number of neighbors we have is overwhelming, and if not, who does it no longer hold true for?

 

I imagine that this is all a little charade in my head, my Ego cleverly constructing excuses for the continued self-preoccupation of my Id. After all, intractable problems are best dealt with by ignoring them and continuing merrily on my way, right? Easier for me, I suppose, but it doesn’t really make things better.

 

So am I doomed to a lifetime of futile service and crushing guilt for not being able to alleviate more than an infinitesimally miniscule portion of the world’s suffering? To paraphrase a wise friend, while God has called us all to love our neighbors, He also “has a unique calling for each of us.” To one He has given a heart for the homeless. To another, a passion for world peace. And to a third, a desire for racial reconciliation. Each person’s “neighbor” may be different, but all have been called to love and show mercy to others, to reach outside the boundaries of “myself” and “us” and into the lives of “them”.

 

So, who is _my_ neighbor? I’m not sure yet, but I definitely know who my neighbor isn’t, and it isn’t “me”.

 

As for what does it mean to love her/him? eh…I’ll deal with that in the future. (To be continued…)