Community is a big buzzword nowadays. Organizations seek to develop it, and people seek to be part of one. Technology gives us more ways to connect than ever, but yet, for many of us, we still feel isolated.
Much has been written about this phenomenon already, but there is one facet of “isolation” that doesn’t get mentioned too often. I myself didn’t notice until I was talking with some churchmates about community building. I realized that while I find plenty of community amongst my classmates and within my church, I don’t feel particularly in touch with the city that I live in.
Don’t get me wrong, Chicago’s a great city, and midwesterners are plenty friendly. There are loads of fun things to do, lots of great restaurants, and I haven’t been yelled at by (too many) passersby on the street. On the other hand, even after living here for a few years, I know only a handful of my neighbors, and none outside of my apartment building. I don’t know where the local, non-transients gather. And I wouldn’t be able to tell you what the day-to-day political and social concerns of my neighborhood are. (Yes, I know we lean liberal)
Part of it is due to my choice of lifestyle. I don’t shop. I don’t drink coffee. If I eat out, it’s at a different place every time. In fact, the only establishments I frequent on a regular basis are my church (which is filled with fellow transients) and the big chain grocery store. If I stopped going to the grocery store, I’m pretty sure that my presence would not be missed.
Another factor is my approach to building relationships. I tend to build my connections through people and groups and activities instead of through location and proximity. They might not sound all that different, after all, activities are required to take place at an actual location (ie. basketball must be played at a basketball court), but in my experience, the friends I’ve made through common interest tend to be just as unrooted in the local community as I am.
The finally, fear. Fear of breaking through the walls of social politeness. Fear of connecting with someone who I might share very little in common with. It’s easy to build connections with my classmates because we’re similar, and it’s acceptable, if not expected. Getting beyond small talk with the local ultimate frisbee crew feels (though probably isn’t) a little dicier.
Is this even a problem? For me personally? Not at the moment. I’m lucky enough to be a student AND a Christian, two groups which tend to have ready-made communities to plug oneself into. But I have the sense that a lot of my peers aren’t quite so lucky. Maybe their interest doesn’t lend itself so readily to group settings. Maybe there’s no suitable group nearby. It’s _really_ easy to while away time watching TV or surfing the internet (or writing blog posts….) and feel like you’re being stimulated and connecting with people. I don’t want to imply that online relationships are somehow inferior to offline ones, but there’s an aspect of physical proximity that can’t be replicated in an online environment.
So, what’s to be done? I’ve alluded to a few ways above, but what else is there? I suppose it might happen naturally if/once I own a place, settle down, get married, and have kids, but that’s a) a big if and b) doesn’t really help me right now.
For those of you who have a bit more local pride than I do, what do you think led to its development? Any suggestions for how to build those connections?
Tags: Reflection